Some people...really.

It leaves me speechless sometimes.

The arrogance, the ignorance, the hypocritical sense of it all.

It makes me wonder: do they like creating unnecessary drama? Do they crave animosity?

Don't they have anything better to do with their lives than start crap on Facebook?

It makes me angry. It makes me want to say something to them.

But then I think to myself: They are probably going to remain like that the rest of their lives.

And then I feel nothing but pity at their incessant pathetic-ness.

Philosophy of Religion?

I've been a Christian for a large portion of my life.

But for the past few months, I decided to take a break from religion just to explore life among other reasons. And I must say, its been an experience.

Its been liberating in various aspects of my life. Its like I don't have to follow these "rules" any more nor must I arduously read the bible, QT, worship and think about God.

I feel like certain limitations have been lifted.

Its ironic. I used to say things like "Jesus I can't live without you."

But now its hard to live with Jesus in my life.

I've been living fine without Christianity for the past few months.

I mean its not like I completely ditched religion and labeled it as unnecessary, but this period of venturing beyond my previous life has opened up new questions and thoughts.

What if religion was just an excuse for people who don't want to take responsibility for the outcomes of life?

If something bad happens, its God's doing not a direct or indirect result of some completely rational stimulus. If something good happens, its not a result of hard work or pure luck: its God's blessings.

Life hasn't changed much with respect to how life used to be for me when I worshiped God religiously. But the fact that I've been doing so fine allows me to question the purpose of the religious practices and ceremonies I have to complete under Christianity.

For Heaven? But technically, I still believe that God exists and that Jesus came to save us all.

And one may ask, could so many people be wrong at the same time?

Well, everyone once believed that the world was flat and that the earth was the center of the universe.

But then again there were eye witnesses of Jesus's miracles.

But if miracles were so effective against our fickle faith then how come Jesus didn't empower disciples to continue the miracles? It would be instrumental in persuading that Christianity is the truth.

I don't know. It all boils down to what you want to believe in.

I guess people who don't have religion may be less disciplined due to the fact that religion has so many rituals and processes.
For now, I definitely won't ditch God, but I will definitely live with a more open mind.

Silent Cry.

The walls are closing in on me. Heavy heart. Emotional baggage. Mental exasperation.

Creeping apathy.

How did this happen? How did it come to this and so quickly?

What the hell is going on? Why is every thing going to hell?

Why do I feel this way? Is it okay for me to feel this way?

Do I have a right? Don't I? Do I need one?

Am I an inanimate object to be used and discarded?

Or do I genuinely mean something...

To my best friend:

It hasn't even been 24 hours since I last saw you.

But as pathetic as it sounds, I miss you already.

You were the one I could talk to. The only one I could be completely and wholeheartedly genuine with. And now you're gone. Hope you're doing well and that you've landed safely.

I'll see you soon.